…And The Future Refused To Change:Doomsday Prophecies From The 16-Bit Era!

Author: Mongunzoo

It’s The End Of The World As We Know It!!!!!

And I feel fine… because as the end comes, I’ll still be exploring the greatest library of games the world has ever known!!!

In the year 2000, we were bombarded with doomsday theories about our computer systems shorting out and our weapons technology turning on us. I still remember neighbors stockpiling water.

Now it is the year 2012 and we await the coming of the Mayan Apocalypse. Why is the world ending? Apparently because the Mayan Calendar ends. The funny thing is that a little tidbit of information is really the only justification we need to send our imaginations into overdrive. It seems to me that there is a fascination with world ending disaster that permeates every aspect of our culture. Books, movies…even video games.

So without further ado let us go on a journey and see what the game developers in the 90’s saw in their crystal balls.  How did the world end in the many Super Nintendo universes that encompass the 16-bit era? And what are the chances of these predictions coming true today?

Let’s Find Out….


Doomsday Prophecy #1: The Robot Apocalypse

Foretold In: The Mega Man X Series

Predicted Outcome: Machines kill off most of the humans, and those who remain live under the protection of benevolent robots fighting a war with the evil robots known as the Reploids.

Probability of Reality: Unlikely. We may see the technology that leads to self-aware machines, but that would require that our best minds cease working on lemon-scented toilet paper and curing hair loss. They would have to work on something that matters, and that probably isn’t gonna happen.


Doomsday Prophecy #2: The Demon Apocalypse

Foretold In: The Actraiser Series

Predicted Outcome: As people lost faith in The Master, his strength weakened and he was defeated by the Lord Demon Tanzra. Demons inherit the earth until The Master re-awakens to kick some demon ass.

Probability of Reality:  Impossible.  Unless you happen to be  Carrie’s Mom. In that case you’re living it. The world just isn’t interesting enough to have monsters such as Werewolves and Shape-Changers. This might be more viable in Harry Potter’s world.


Doomsday Prophecy #3: The Hunger Game WITH BOTS 

Foretold in:  Battle Clash and Metal Combat:  Falcon’s Revenge

Predicted Outcome: In a world where every nation competes in a  forced robotic duel to the death to gain supremacy, there is no more war. Just a determined young man out to avenge his father’s death.  

Probability of Reality: It could happen… Who WOULDN’T want to watch giant robot duels on television as an alternative to warfare? Plus you KNOW Japan already got ’em.


Doomsday Prophecy #4: The Zombie Apocalypse

Foretold In: Zombies Ate My Neighbors

Predicted Outcome: Zombies are attacking everywhere and EATING THE NEIGHBORS!!! It is up to two young Suburbanite youth to put them back in the grave using squirt guns and bottle rockets.  And a weed-whacker…

Probability of Reality: We’re already there. One look at games, books, movies, and music tells you everything you need to know: Zombies rule the earth.


 Doomsday Prophecy #5: The World of Ruin

Foretold In: Final Fantasy III

Predicted Outcome:  A madman blows up the world and only the pieces remain. What is left is nothing but misery and hopelessness.

Probability of Reality: Of all the SNES prophecies, this is the one that has the best shot! Though I doubt it will be caused by a mad clown moving some statues around! It’s a funny thing, though! Kefka was teaching me about mass murder long before I learned about it in school. And they say games are not educational…


Doomsday Prophecy #6: Lavos Awakens…

Foretold In:  Chrono Trigger

Predicted Outcome: After billions of years of feeding off of the earth’s energy, The alien parasite Lavos awakens and sucks the planet dry. Nothing remains except devastation, and the survivors have no food or resources.  Only a seed of hope remains.

Probability of Reality: Not a chance. Though we really do need to figure out this time travel thingy just in case…


Doomsday Prophecy #7: Self-Destruction

Foretold In: Soul Blazer, Illusion of Gaia, Terranigma

Predicted Outcome: Through a series of stupid choices, humankind has successfully sewed the seeds of their own destruction through bad bargains, mismanagement of resources, and meddling with powers beyond their comprehension. It is up to a brave young youth to correct the problems and in some cases, resurrect the planet.

Probability of Reality: Another one that hits close to home. We live in an age where mismanagement of the environment can be disastrous. Better be on our toes…


Doomsday Prophecy #8: GIYGAS!!! 

Foretold In: Earthbound

Predicted Outcome: An alien consciousness with serious mommy issues is warping time and space and altering reality as we know it. This will culminate in the destruction of the universe. Unless the proper “Chosen Ones” are warned,  the fate of the cosmos rests in the hands of a tiny bee…

Probability of Reality: Unlikely. Although it is a strange world, it does not come even CLOSE to Earthbound’s bizarre universe! The moment I start to encounter New Age retro hippies, manly fish brothers, and moles that all claim they are the third strongest monster in a dungeon, I’ll sound the alarm.


Doomsday Prophecy #9: The World of Stupid

Foretold In: Revolution X

Predicted Outcome: A totalitarian government takes over and deprives the youth of the world rock music and video games. Our only hope lies in the Band Aerosmith and one lone CD-hurling mercenary???

Probability of Reality: Not Gonna Happen. Even in an age where AeroSmith is relevant, this would be an impossibility. And if we ever come to a point when we must rely on a toneless and bored Brad Whitford to inspire us with his calls of “tear down the wall”,  we might as well bow before our new overlords.


And with that we must end our consultation with the psychics of the 16-bit era. What other games contain pearls from the future? We must continue to look for answers.

CHEERS!!! Unbelievable

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Mongunzoo

I am an avid fan of the SNES who never really left. When others were upgrading to the 64 and enjoying Star-Collector Mario, I was Perusing Japanese auction sites for hidden gems on the other side of the ocean! I now have a collection spanning over 200 SNES games and accessories. When not playing on SNES and writing for this website, I enjoy traveling, good food, drink, and company, and deep discussions with Grimm.

3 Comments:

  1. Wonderful idea for an article! I love pulling themes out of media, so reading some literary theory about video games is a joy.

    Sadly, post-appocalyptic games were exactly the kind I was discouraged from playing growing up. Instead we played sports games, which feature simulation of real-life events and the occasional fictional element like gravity defiance.

    Which makes me wonder about futuristic sports games. F-Zero, Super Baseball 2020 and Bill Laimbeer Basketball come to mind, but that’s about it. Well, I guess after the apocalypse we’ll have more important things to do than play sports, like save the planet.

  2. this was a hilarious article actually and funny that a lot of old Super Nintendo games do have doomsday prophies in them!

  3. Fun article!

    Some other SNES game doomsday prophecies:

    Super Metroid – In the future, Space Pirates will unleash havoc on the Galactic Federation by stealing the last known Metroid

    Donkey Kong Country – We;re in for a Planet of the Apes style future, where gorillas and monkeys reign supreme. The Kremlings will make a strong push to bring the world back to reptile dominance though.

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